Dear Son,

Six Ways to be a Better Father | Ep 62 #fatherhood #mistakes #lessonslearned

April 20, 2023

Enjoy the visual experience here:

"If I would've known then what I know now" a common copout. Yep, I said it. This is literally the adult version of "I can teleport," as my 8-year-old often proclaims. For argument's sake, let's play this out. What would father of 5 me tell father of 1 me? A lot!

Becoming a parent is a wonderfully terrifying experience; at least it was for me. I'm willing to bet that this sentiment is shared across many families, cultures, and ethnicities. Perhaps the root causes for the fear differ, but the fear is prevalent. For some, lack of resources may be the burden while others may fear the process based on their childhood experience. No matter the catalyst, the reality is that most parents aren't prepared for the experience in some way. 

In this episode we review some of our less than stellar behaviors during our fatherhood journey. Experts, we are not; however, we do have valuable perspectives as we've been entrusted with large families (by the today's standards). Hopefully, a few of these observations will help some new, veteran, and fathers-to-be understand that fatherhood is a blessing and is completely manageable with the right tools. We highly recommend that you consume the entire episode for the best results. Also, meet us in the comments or tag us with your opinion on social media via the links below. As always, we welcome your perspective. It takes a village. 

#daddyissues #accountable #blackfathers #fatherandson #justicesystem #juveniles #consequences 

Six tips for new or young fathers:

1. You don't know everything about fatherhood, and that's ok. Be open to new information throughout your journey, and adapt quickly.

2. Relax. Give your child time to learn and grow at their (healthy) pace, and don't judge them based on your unfounded expectations. 

3. Help. Be attentive and accommodating to the mother (as much as circumstances allow). Parenting is a team sport.

4. Follow through. Don't abandon a sound parenting approach before it has time to work. Children develop and respond at different paces, and may need more time to adjust.

5. Never assume how strong the mother is. Childbirth is a traumatic experience. The mother may not have words to associate with what she is feeling. Don't leave her to manage those feelings alone. 

6. Allow your child to have a voice. As much as you may believe the child wants to be just like you, he/she is an individual...a human. Guide them but allow them to become who they were designed to be. 

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