The Work of Byron Katie

I’m Her Mother

Sept. 18, 2015

After her teenage daughter drops out of school and pursues alcohol and drugs, Angela contemplates what it means to be her mother. She says she wants to show her fourteen-year-old the way, but she doesn’t know what that would be.’I didn’t know, either,’ Byron Katie says, remembering how her daughter wouldn’t listen to her. But when Katie began to question her stressful thoughts, everything grew clear. When Angela tells Katie that it’s her duty to take care of her daughter, Katie suggests that she question the thought ‘I’m her mother.’ ‘You’re her mother’—is it true?’ After Katie guides her through the four questions of The Work, Angela turns the thought around: ‘I am not her mother.’ ‘Can you see that out-of-control, terrified woman?’ Katie says. ‘That’s not her mother. That’s not what I was when I was so out of control with my daughter. It’s not the mother I wanted for my daughter. I loved her so deeply, and that didn’t look like a loving mother to me. And once I went deeper into this turnaround, everything shifted. My daughter discovered the power of The Work, and she didn’t have to go through the suffering I went through. Now she’s a mother herself, and an excellent one.’ copyright 2015 Byron Katie International, Inc. All rights reserved. For more information, visit" neither hosts nor alters podcast files. All content © its respective owners.