the Difficult Listening Channel

Difficult Listening Channel - 227 - Crackle and Hum or: How to Make Enemies and Piss Off People

Sept. 3, 2013

Last night when he went to sleep, the banks were solvent and his money was safe. Today...not so much. Could be that this Cypress thing got out of hand, but that's the least of his worries. Because that strange noise he just heard coming from his living room turned out to be the cat snorting blow off a dead hooker's ass. And if word gets out about this, it could affect his membership status at the country club. Upon seeing him, the cat darts away towards the litterbox followed by a loud crashing sound. En route, he grabs his revolver. Can't be too careful. What a hell of a mess. Litter's everywhere and there's no sign of the cat. That's when the war started. Bombs fell and powerful explosions close by shook his house. Forget the cat, blow, and the rotting hooker, he's got bigger issues now. Someone's gone and invaded and nobody, including him, thought it could happen today. Especially today. It's garbage day and now there's an invasion. The neighborhood, hell, probably the whole damn city is being bombed back to the stone age. A quick glance at the television showed thousands of paratroopers and a massive veil of smoke. Just then, the power went out. He turned to look out his back window and what he saw threw him into a complete panic. Paratroopers were landing everywhere, including in his yard. But these soldiers were different… they were cats! Cats armed with AK-47s! His revolver slipped out of his hand and down to the floor with a soft thud. It would be useless now anyway. email: [email protected] web: www.michaeloster.com

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